Midlife Musings

I remember Nancy Reagan and her “just say no” campaign back in the 80s. Am I dating myself? I guess it doesn’t much matter since I tell you right up there in the tagline that I am almost 40. Closer and closer, even, since Friday is the big day. As an aside, the kids were just watching America’s Got Talent, and they had some break dancers on. Country looked at me and said “they usually do that on the streets with no mats”, as if she were telling me something I didn’t know. Ha, yeah. I took her to school right quick. Umm, oops. Sidetracked again. Back to Nancy.

Just say no probably works real well to avoid drugs in the first place. In fact, I’d go so far as to say that it’s a real nice plan, and a sure-fire method. But what do you do once you’ve said yes, and find yourself in the grip of a demon? As I have struggled with quitting cigarettes this past couple of weeks, I have been near crazy at certain points, yelling at my family, stomping around like an overgrown toddler, and just a real laugh riot, a joy to be around. Or you know, not, depending on your perspective. It is an incredibly difficult pit to crawl out of. And while you may think I am making a mountain out of a molehill, I am prepared to tell you that statistically, it is more difficult to stay off cigarettes than heroin. Just think about that for a few minutes.

Ok! So, let’s get back to what I am actually supposed to be discussing here, which is drug addiction and drug treatment. Whatever your issue, from prescription drug addiction to alcohol and any substance addiction in between, the folks at 1800nodrugs want to help you find addiction treatment. They specialize in finding treatment options for your specific circumstances. The service is free to you.

I understand how the mind of an addict works, at least a little bit. My drug was legal, and so that spared me from some things, but it was still a drug. I truly believe that part of the reason I have had so many revelations about myself lately is that I have been engaging myself more as I dealt with my addiction. Thinking about what made me tick, letting myself inside my head. And can I just say that inside my own head is sometimes a scary place to be? I’ve got a long road ahead, because even though the physical addiction is mostly broken now, the mental and emotional addiction will take quite a bit longer to tackle, and there are no treatment centers for nicotine addiction that I know of.
drug rehabilitation

Mama and I went to see Grandmother last night. While we were enroute, the nurse called to let us know that grandmother had a skin tear. They claim that Grandmother was swinging her legs in the hoyer lift. HA! Grandmother can’t move her arms, but she can suddenly swing her legs? As if.

Anyway, we got there, and there was a sock with fresh blood on top of her laundry, so we checked out her leg. When we pulled the covers back, an incredible stench just rushed out at us. I looked at her other leg, and noticed brown goo on that sock. When I looked at that leg, the tear she’d gotten last week was inflamed with readily apparent pussy pockets of nastiness that made me want to rip the hair right out of someone’s head. People should not smell like rotten meat, ok??

So! I pulled her laundry out of the hamper and noticed the socks as I went. There was laundry in there from last Friday, and one sock from each pair had that nasty brown goo on it. Her leg has been oozing pus and corruption for three days, smelling like a dead pig in July and no one noticed that? Hell-oh?

Recently BP has been in the news, and not in a real good way. Environmental activists are once again up in arms over how BP is “destroying the environment”, “killing the animals” and is, in general, a hemorrhoid on the butt of the world, and should probably be fined or shut down or maybe just SHOT, and we don’t need their stinkin’ energy anyway. And they are mostly sitting in air conditioned homes and offices while they type this tripe on their not-solar-powered computers. My heart bleeds. Really.

I just posted some words I wrote several months ago on this topic, and I believe if you search my archives, you might find a rant or two about media bias, and how one ought to read several news sources to begin to get a grasp on the multiple sides of any issue. Here’s what’s true in this case:

• BP will be dumping more ammonia into lake Michigan. What you aren’t likely to hear from the screech committee is that BP is still well within federal guidelines.
• BP wants to process heavy crude from Canada. Get that? Ca-na-da. A stable and reliable next-door-neighbor source. Not the Middle East. The heavy crude requires more extensive process and BP has planned $3.8 billion expansion to allow that. In the meantime, they need this still-within-federal-guidelines leeway.
• BP has been part of the community in Whiting for 117 years. They have voluntarily reduced polluting discharges, they have supplied jobs in the community and they are supplying gasoline, diesel and jet fuel which we need. Oh, and they also operate a wastewater treatment facility.

So here’s what I think: much ado about nothing. If we are going to continue to rely on fossil fuels to power our increasingly luxurious lifestyles, it’s time to just admit that and do the best we can with it. If we don’t want to pay the price in the form of a damaged environment, then we need to be willing to draw that pristine water with a hand pump, and haul it from the creek. And also, buy a horse, and let that Mercedes rust out in the garage. We’ll figure something out for dealing with the pony pies, I’m sure, and the increased demands on the food supply, and all the inconvenience that comes with that choice. Also, leave the city, because horses require pasture. You can’t keep them in apartments. And one more thing: turn off the air conditioner, and also the furnace. You may use a fireplace if and only if you practice replacement planting. And if you can’t agree with all that?? shut up.

Now then. I have to put this silly badge on this post: . However, if you’ve been reading this blog for very long, you know that I haven’t said anything here that I haven’t at least hinted at before.

back in January, I mentioned drilling in Alaska in passing. I’m mentioning it now, so that if you read this blog by feed, you’ll see my old views before you read what I am about to write. And also, to tell you to get some coffee, because my next post will probably be quite lengthy. Here’s what I said then

There are not many causes I support actively year-round. I am more a “call to action” type causist. I do take measures to reduce our garbage and such. I like to tread lightly upon the earth, but at the same time, I realize I am authorized to take dominion of it. That doesn’t mean to use resources unwisely, though.

I do think environmentalism often goes to far. The same folks who are screaming about the price of gasoline are also screaming that we shouldn’t drill for oil in Alaska. To me that doesn’t make much sense.

I hope to be back by mid-afternoon with the next post. It will take awhile to write.

When I rode to Carowinds with Pastor’s daughter last weekend, we talked for awhile about the missions trips she had been on. She worked with an outfit whose name I cannot remember, but they put together work teams to go to different countries. The teens do actual building while they are on their missions trips. She’s been to Scotland and France, and has wonderful memories of both people and places. She did tell me that boot camp, as the initial training is called, was not particularly fun, though. Of course, I think she was probably right. Living in a tent in Florida in the middle of the summer is just NOT my idea of a good time, but she says its worth it, so I’ll have to believe her. She said that in order to save money, the kids actually haul most of their food with them on their flights! They take very few things with them in order to have room left in their luggage to do this.

I don’t know how the travel was arranged for them, but it was Carrie’s trips that came to mind when I saw Golden Rule Travel today. They specialize in missions flights and adoption travel. Of course, you know the Golden Rule, “do unto others as you would have them do unto you”, but you might not recognize the reference to going the second mile. In New Testament times, any Roman soldier could command a Jew to walk with him for one mile, carrying his burdens. Jesus told the people that if they were compelled to walk one mile, to walk with the soldier for two. I imagine it wasn’t a popular speech, since it also included the gems about turning the other cheek, and giving up a cloak as well as a coat. It’s from the Sermon on the Mount, found in Matthew 5. The thing about missions travel is that missionaries are not usually paid, not in the sense most people think of, collecting a weekly check. They usually have to raise the funds they need to get to their destination and support themselves while they are there, and the travel is usually the largest part of the financial burden. When Golden Rule Travel says they are going the second mile, they mean they aren’t just finding you a good deal, they are finding you the very best deal. They are helping you spend God’s money wisely. And then they are standing by to make sure your travel goes off as smoothly as possible, with 24/7 emergency service. I’ve read the testimonials on the site, and I was pretty impressed. I think you will be, too.

So……….I was as quiet as a wascally wabbit about it, but I did something this week, I’m pretty happy with. Way back in January, I was given the go ahead to work on the church website. For one reason and another, that had never come together as it should have, and the website had not been done. This week, I made an executive decision and purchased additional hosting and another domain. I showed it to pastor and a few others this morning, and everyone seemed happy with what I had done. The main domain will act as a cyber-bulletin for us, and there will also be a password protected directory.

I want to thank Retta for making the headers for me. She’s a graphics genius!

Yesterday I said

I get stressed trying to get everything done that needs doing. I know I can get it done, because I usually do. So, I just need to make a schedule routine and stick to it, develop a plan and work it, so I don’t feel so out of control. In the past, I have done that, and then not followed the plan once I had things semi under control. That was not a smart choice. A routine is better than a schedule for me, because each day is different. Very few things need a rigid time, but the whole days needs to have a predictable flow, otherwise I get antsy.

Today, I played around a little with some scheduling software called Say the Time. This alarm clock download will actually tell you what time it is, plus you can program it to remind you of specific things you need to do at given times. It will read you your own typed notes in a pleasant voice, either male or female, and it will also run programs for you, once you tell it to do so.

The program is easy to download and set up, and you can try it free for 30 days. If you decide to keep it, it’s just 24.95.The interface is pretty intuitive, and by that I mean I was able to get it to tell me to do something the first time I tried it, LOL! I didn’t do it, of course, because I am hard-headed as I have admitted before. That’s not the software’s fault. If you are having trouble getting it all done, why don’t you go ahead and try it out?.

This is my fifth post today, and I am thinking it will be my last one here, though I am promising nothing, because………….well, that’s just how I am. So far, I have wished for new outdoor furniture, and gone outside to sit on the old. I have wished for a fast new car and flashed back to my late teens. I’ve wished for freedom from some demons I didn’t even ralize I had in a post that took me totally by surprise and I have wished to travel. This post is about what I don’t wish to have– a truck toolbox. Ya know why? ‘Cause I don’t have a truck. HA!