Midlife Musings

First the woohoo: when I weighed yesterday, the scale said 150. I finally budged off 154! I was so excited, I tell you! Oh, wait, I am telling you. One-Fifty means I am halfway to my goal. One-Fifty means I’m back at what has been my normal weight for most of my adult life. I’m not willing to stay here, but yesterday, One-Fifty felt mighty fine.

Now for the uh-oh. I didn’t put that porn there. My blog is being intermittently hacked. I’m not quite sure what to do about it, except delete it when I find it. The hackers are using invisible font, so it only shows up in the feed. That means, I’ll take it as a personal favor if you go ahead and click through to leave me a comment if you see it in the feed.

That about wraps it up. I’ve been too busy doing the next thing these past days to be thinking really profound thoughts. Well, that’s true and not true. I just haven’t figured out when/how/if/where I am going to blog about it all. Some really wonderful things have been happening in my marriage, re-adjusting of roles, some goal directed priority shifting, some attitudes repaired. It’s kinda nice being here just now, and the sex has been amazing, too. Just sayin’

Sometimes, women can get real hard headed. We can attempt to wrest control from a man because we feel like he’s incompetent. Now, if you happen to be married to a laid back type guy when you do that, he’s not liable to say much. But it won’t be long until everyone in the house is miserable, and you are in a bigger pickle than you were in when you thought hopping in the driver’s seat was a good plan, and the sex is routine and boring, if there is any at all, and you are bickering over nothing all the time. It truly sucks. And then, since you have taken on way more trouble than God designed you to handle, you are at maximum stress load. You know what that causes, right? More bickering, less sex, bigger pickle. That causes more stress. And pretty soon, you are wondering why you are even married. You’ve stepped so far out of the God designed plan for marriage that if you don’t duck right back under that umbrella and f-a-s-t, you are going to end up divorced. You’re all out of love and all out of sorts and you are tearing down your house with your own hands because of your refusal to embrace … because you are foolish, just like Proverbs says.

Sometimes, though, if you are truly blessed, someone may perceive what’s going on. Mostly, she will probably perceive it because God clearly reveals it to her. And she will begin to say things in conversation that make you think. And she will begin to pray. And she may send you a book to read, and she will pray some more. And then when things are just about ready to crack from the stress, she will come flat out and say YOU need to pray. YOU need to pray for God to remind you why you married that man. YOU need to pray to love him like you used to. YOU need to pray that God will help you love and respect and honor that man who is your husband.

And so you will pray all that, even though you may roll your eyes while you are doing it. And then maybe your laid back husband will finally say something that pricks your hard, cold heart, when he maybe or maybe didn’t mean it quite the way you take it. And you will chew on that thing for several days, and you will have great trepidation, but you will decide to get your butt out of the driver’s seat, and let him get back in. You might have to coax him back into that position. You might have been driving so long that you have to remind him that he’s holding the wheel now. You’ll probably even have to snap your lips shut sometimes to keep from speaking out when you should be quiet. You might even have to live with waiting on a decision instead of getting an instant answer. (You might take that opportunity to realize your husband makes good decisions because he stops to think before he speaks.)

You might even have to have some hard conversations about authority and submission. You might have to explain that submission is a gift that you freely give. It’s impossible to make someone submit. You can beat someone into subservience, this is true. But you cannot force anyone to partner with you in submission. It’s a gift, a choice the submitter makes. If you’ve been hard headed and willful for a long time, you might have a husband who has forgotten how soft and loving you can be, just as you have also forgotten. I can tell you though, that when you look up at him with eyes full of trust and love, something will happen in him. It may not be overnight, but that good man you married will rise to the occasion. He will cherish you again, and he will treat you like a queen again. You will become heirs together of the grace of life once more. And the sex, it will be amazing

I finally realized the other day that when God told Eve that her desire would be to her husband, that was not such a bad thing. It was her protection and blessing, see. That thing God said to Eve, He was giving her the gift of submission, I think, so that she could accept Adam’s rule with grace and love, so that her respect and gentleness would help him to be a benevolent authority to her.

Hmm, I guess I decided here and today would be the right place to blog about all that after all.

Do good things come to those who wait?
Your best friend’s spouse is being unfaithful. Would you tell your friend? If so, how?
Which part of your body do you like the least? Would you change it through plastic surgery, if possible?

Ha! Ha on me! I totally came over here to post Manic Monday, but it’s time for Tackle -it Tuesday instead. Uh, haven’t tackled anything except a mountain of school work, so!! Manic Monday it is!

I think good things come to those who work for them. Sometimes that is hard physical work, sometimes it’s emotional or spiritual work. Sometimes it’s all of the above. But no, I don’t agree that good things come just by waiting.

I cannot ever imagine in my wildest dreams this happening, in any way, shape or form. my best friend’s husband is, I hope, wiser than that.

Umm, I dunno. I wish my belly were smaller, but I have carried 8 babies in it. I wish my bum were plumper when I lose weight, but… yeah, ok, I would totally get my butt enhanced. Yes, I would.

We’re “camping” this weekend, which has turned out to mean that we sleep in the tents at night, split the cooking almost evenly between the grill and the electric appliances, and watch the races in the living room. It’s fun anyway, and here I am just a few minutes ago talking to dh, who was in the kitchen.

Ignore the mess in the background. I told you: I’m not really here, I’m camping.

I have been a fan of the Sherlock Holmes mysteries since I read my first (highly abridged) when I was about 8. It was Hound of the Baskervilles, in one of those little squareish Treasured Classics that they sell for children. I was amazed as a young teen to reacquaint myself with Holmes and Watson when I received a copy of the complete series, a book I still have, mind you.

Today, though, I am not going to talk about a book. Instead, I am going to tell you about a new game! The Lost Cases of Sherlock Holmes contains 16 cases, plus a bonus. The game is suitable for ages 10 and up, being mostly based on hidden objects and other visual discrimination games. The historically accurate settings and characters are lots of fun as well. It was a relaxing few minutes, and although I beat the game and solved the case before the time expired, it was a little closer than I’d like to admit. Who knew tulips could blend so well into their surroundings??!!??

I’m intrigued enough to play again, and I imagine from the chorus of oohs and ahs that were coming from my elbow that I will be coerced into sharing my computer so that others can enjoy the game as well. I’m sorely tempted to re-open the game and try another case or eight, but I’ve been promising my kids a grand camping adventure for Memorial Day for six weeks now. It’s time to go pitch a tent. Well, two tents, we’re a big family, LOL!

I think I must be caught in some sort of weight unloss nightmare! Seriously. I have weighed 154 for the past decade, except when I lost weight nursing. That’s where I want to be, at that weight loss point, around 140. NOT at this 154. And this was a horrible food week (month?) for me. We eat hot dogs as a family every Saturday. We ate hotdogs and hamburgers at Boy Scout Crossover on the 10th. And we ate hot dogs and hamburgers at a cookout on Mother’s Day, the 11th. And we had hot dogs here on the 17th. And we ate hot dogs and hamburgers at a church cookout on the 18th.

Did you do the math? We have had hot dogs 4 times since the 10 of May! Do you know how many calories are in a hot dog? Including the bun, about 300, depending on brand. Sigh. Craziness.

let me do some more math, real quick. You can follow along. Each weiner contains 2 ounces of what might possible be consider meat, and roughly 180 calories (we use Ball Park franks, because, truly, I detest hot dogs, and I refuse to eat any more cheap weiners and my dh refuses to give up hot dogs, so that’s our compromise. So, 180 calories divided by 2 ounces of meat equals 90 calories per meat ounce. Umm, scuse me. Lean beef is less than 70 calories an ounce, and chicken breast is about 30.

Can I really afford 90 calories an ounce for meat, when I am trying to keep it under 1500 calories a day and I need 5 meats, 5 grains, 3 dairy, 2 veggies and 1.5 fruits? I didn’t think so.

Yes, it was my mother, and she says she was in her late 20s when that portrait was made.

If you knew that every minute of the next 24 hours of your life would be recorded on camera is there anything you would change about your habits?

What is the best example of “perfection” that you can think of?

Haha, yes. I would not waste so much time, but yet I would spend more time having fun with my kids. In my mind, that is not quite as contradictory as it sounds when I read it. The problem is that I waste so much time that I don’t have any left to play, see? That’s just whack!

Ooh, where would I go? Great question. I want to say Ang.’s house, but no, I don’t think that’s it. I’d like her to go with me, though. And that doesn’t help narrow down where very much, does it? How narrow does it have to be? Can I just say Europe? And that I’d like a Eurail Pass thrown in?

Jesus Christ, and Him alone. Second best, and not even a close second–Black Cherry ice cream.