Thanks, cuz, for the hat-tip!
10 things I want to say to 10 (or 17) different people:
1. That thing you did, I wish you hadn’t. Every day. 32 years later, it’s still every day. But it’s final, and I am doing my best to come to terms with it. I loved you, I love you still, and I am sorry I didn’t get to tell you more. And I am sorry that when I did, you were too far gone for it to change things. Godspeed.
2. I forgive you. You are an asshole, but I acknowledge you were only doing what had been done to you. If I have my way, I will never see your face again.
3. Thank you for not noticing that I was not responding to your energetic, extroverted overtures, and continuing to badger me out of my cave. I needed a friend, and now I have one. This is probably the only time I will ever be grateful that someone didn’t leave me to write in peace.
4. I hope what you have now is worth what you gave up. I wish I had known how differently we define the term “best friend.” But I will be forever grateful for the pushes you gave me, and I promise to one day look back and smile about us.
5. Thank you for being only mild shocked and mostly pleased when you found out the truth. And for the honest encouragement to be me, all of me, all of the time.
6. Girl. SMH. We are okay. Remind me to tell you how the Japanese mend broken pottery.
7. You amaze me. Every time we communicate. ‘Nuff said about that.
8. I’m terrified you are going to freak out if I ever come clean to you. Sigh. I don’t know why, because you have managed to adapt every time I have self-disclosed, but still…terrified.
9. You, I cannot forgive yet. You are a blind misogynist and a power-wielding idiot. I could *maybe* forgive you if I was not aware that you should have known better based on your training, and if you hadn’t also told lies about what was said between us. Fiduciary trust, jerk. Google it.
10. You are my sunshine, my only sunshine. You make me happy when skies are grey. You’ll never know, dear, how much I love you! Times eight.
There not quite enough to Wipe hard drive, but a good start on a defrag!