Midlife Musings

Reflections on life from 40-something

February 16 Love Lingers

March13

Februarysixteen

I took this picture because when I saw this scene, it made my heart stop. And then, when it started beating again, it broke. At the Pretty Place I told you about a few days ago, there is a very small graveyard. When I went out there the Monday after Valentine’s Day was on Saturday, I saw this bunch of balloons on one of the graves.

I took the picture from outside the fence, because that was as close as I felt like I could get without trampling all over someone’s private and intimate grief. Even though no one was in sight.

When all else is gone, love lingers.

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February 10 The Pretty Place

March10

“Come on, and I’ll show you a pretty place, a place you can go to collect your thoughts when you must leave there.”

Febtenth

This is the view from the van as I was leaving that place, after spending a bit of time there. I was so delighted with it that I forgot to take a picture until I was already in drive. This isn’t even the prettiest part of the Pretty Place, it’s just what I could capture without getting out of the van again.

As I type this, I’ve been back several times. It’s a great place to talk to yourself. It’s a good place to listen to a still small voice. It’s quiet, it’s peaceful, it’s pretty, and it’s sane. And when I leave it, so am I, for at least the time it takes me to drive home again.

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Jan 31

February28

Did you know that smell is the most evocative of the senses? It is powerful. My Grand-dad has been dead now 20 years, and he quit farming 10 before that, but if I smell a sun-warmed field, I am instantly moved back in time. I am young again, and he is still alive. And wood smoke is the scent of Papa, and he is laughing and saying “Denise, you are cuckoo.” Green beans simmering on the stove with bacon in them, that’s Grandma, and a nursing home is my Grandmother. (I have to add that I hope with time, more pleasant smells will bring her to mind.)

Anyway, you know that old shampoo commercial that goes “I’m gonna wash that man right outta my hair”? That’s sorta what I did on the 31st.

wash that man right outta my bed

Jan 30

February28

January thirtieth found me back at the movies, this time for Underworld: Rise of the Lycans. All day. I tell ya, I do love a movie, but it gets a little boring to see the same one six times.

In a row.

Six times.

Anyway, Guitar Guy had dropped off his daughter for the last show, and as we were leaving, we saw this young man playing in the lobby. We thought Guitar Guy would think it was funny, so I asked if I could take his picture and post it on the internet.

Janthirty

And thus a nameless stranger has become part of my Project 365. Never mind that he really does have a name and probably isn’t a bit stranger than I am.

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Project 365

February22
utterli-image

Mobile post sent by Cass using Utterlireply-count Replies.

January 28

February19

Jantwentyeight

No clue. Seriously. How sad is that? But apparently I was sitting in the parking lot of one of the local shopping centers, reading.

For reasons unknown.

To anyone.

Even me.

Grrrrr

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January 27th

February19

January 27th was my sister’s birthday. I spent the afternoon with a friend and then I came home to discover that sometimes one person posting one picture can lead to someone else posting this one:
dresser in the living room

Just to record the true and actual state of affairs. To keep it real. To acknowledge the mental PVC fence in the house, the elephant in the corner.

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January 26

February18

Jantwentysix
Ain’t that pretty? This is the inside of The Music Loft, which is one of the music stores in the next town over. I ended up there on the 26th, and thought it would make an interesting photo. As you can see, they have quite a selection of electric guitars. The acoustics are in the back room off the room you see here.

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I'm Cass. I am a full-time mom to eight great children, a Christian and a blogger. I'm also a knitter, a reader and a movie watcher. And a collector of eclectic oddities.

For the first time in 18 and a half years, I have my own little corner again. Somewhere along the way, I seem to have lost myself, and now that I realize I'm missing, I'm on the look out for me. You maybe don't know what that means, but then again, maybe you do. Regardless, this is where I'll be when I'm not being a mother or a knitter. This is where I'll be just me. And if no one ever reads it, that's ok. I'll know it's here.


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