In leopard print if you can find them. I’m just sayin….

 
So for a while, like, 30 years give or take, I have been confused by men.  Well, that’s not entirely true.  I understand them well enough, and I get along with them.  I both comprehend and speak man-ese.  It’s the whole man/woman dynamic that gets me  addled.  They have this on again/off again thing they do.  Want you, don’t, want you, maybe, want you, don’t, how soon can you be here, never mind cause I’m busy?  WTH?   I thought it was them, and then I saw this picture a few minutes ago, and I realized…it may be me. Maybe this whole time that I thought I was mirroring men in their indecisiveness, they were mirroring me.

I have to admit that I have a certain ambivalence about relationship. Not relationships, because I don’t deal in multiple romantic interests at once.  RelationSHIP.  I’m fairly content single, calling my own shots, doing what I want when I want.  Sometimes, yeah, I want male company.  That whole breathless excitement thing.  Confirmation that I still have it going on. But mostly I only think about my “relationship status” when one of my long-term single friends pairs off. There’s this momentary “what’s wrong with me, that I can’t find a man and form a real relationship?”

But maybe I keep ending up in the friend zone because I am a damn good friend, which is NOT a bad thing.  Maybe I end up in the friend zone because that’s exactly where I need to be, where I am most comfortable  Hmmm.  I’ll have to consider that a bit.

What does that have to do with leopard print skivvies?  Buying brazen underwear to wear for my own delight is a wildly liberating thing.  It’s a fresh perspective on small pleasures that are just about me. It’s saying to myself that it’s okay to not know exactly what I want, and a reminder that maybe, just maybe the non-relationship relationship is enough for me just now. Maybe, just maybe it’s time to quit worrying about it and enjoy it for what it is.

P.S. I found mine at Wal-Mart!

P.P.S.  This article, Unconditional Love versus Sexual Desire, though only tangentially related to this post is BOSS.  I found it by clicking a link after clicking a link Zemanta suggested.  Zemanta is also BOSS.